Confidence Can Be Like A Bad Boyfriend
So you’ve got the topic, done the prep and you’re ready to go. Your audience is waiting, if not with baited breath then certainly with a cuppa and expectation. And you want to speak confidently.
You feel a little excited. You have good butterflies. But then…
You’re live. You freeze.
Suddenly your confidence has left you in the learch like a bad first date escaping out the loo window.
What do you do now? How can you speak confidently when you’d rather give it all up like a bad joke?
Here are five ways to speak with confidence and put you back on the wagon while you’re live with an audience. Whether it’s a webinar, Facebook Live, or in front of a group of rabid business networkers.
Suddenly your confidence has left you in the learch like a bad first date escaping out the loo window. Click To Tweet
Remember the lag
If this is Facebook Live – remember that at the very beginning of a facebook live broadcast and throughout, there’s a lag. People don’t get the notification that you’re live for 30 seconds or so.
So once you’re live, smile at the lens so you are looking at people when the watch your video, collect your thoughts, take a breath, look at your cheat sheet if you have one, get ready…
And soldier on.
Learning how to speak confidently takes practice. The more you do this the better you'll get. Click To Tweet
Start Speaking
Talk about something. Anything. Just starting to talk and hearing your voice will shock you back into action.
Just commenting on the weather or saying hello to someone watching might be enough to get you on your way. Learning how to speak confidently takes practice – so the more you do this the better you’ll become.
A Standard Introduction
Have a standard intro like your favourite podcast.
Say something like:
Hi and welcome. I’m Jenny and today I’m joining you live to talk about xyz.
Having a standard opening line that you’ve practiced a few times will give you breathing space and improve your confidence. It also helps people get used to hearing the same thing from you – adding to their confidence in you and your brand.
having a standard introduction is like wearing a comfy pair of slippers Click To Tweet

SlowDdown Cowboy
Slow down your rate of speech. It’s interesting that the more nervous and excited we are about our topic, the faster and more out of breath we get.
I learnt a super valuable lesson speaking at a wedding once (read about it here)
In a nutshell, even though I thought I was speaking terribly slowly – in slow motion, because I was sucking in air in between lines of a poem and I didn’t want everyone to know I was out of breath – it was one of the best public speaking gigs I’d ever done. It has helped me for nearly 30 years since.
Slow down. Regulate your breathing, so your heart rate slows. It seems like you’re speaking really slowly but it’s probably spot on.
The aim is to get that oxygen back to your brain and the confidence back in your attitude. Click To Tweet
Admit to Your Nerves
Admit you’re feeling nervous and then crack on.
I’ve seen a couple of first timers recently saying “full disclosure – I am quite nervous so I am going to look at my notes/have a sip of water/take a breath etc.”
People were straight onto it with supportive comments. She kept going then and didn’t mention it again, and her content was awesome.
Feeling nervous is normal. You’re putting yourself out there and people appreciate that. But there are tips to follow to stay on track so you and your awesome business message are front and centre and not you breathlessly apologising for being nervous and giving up mid message.
Even the pros suffer nerves. It's normal and shows you care. Click To Tweet
You can do this! Nervous about going live and want to practice? You can go live on your personal Facebook profile to ‘only me’ so no-one else sees it but you. Want to know how? Here’s a video tutorial (skip to 2.10 for the personal profile instructions).
Over to you
So there are the five ways to speak with confidence – do you have anything you’d like to add? Let us know in the comments if you have tried any of these tips and how they worked for you.
Need support to set up your video and live broadcast strategy? Get in touch today – I’d love to hear from you

Thanks, great article.
You’re welcome!
Thankyou Jenny love the article Just what I needed to hear !
That’s great Claudia! Pleased I could help a little x
Good evening. Thanks a lot! Useful article!.
I think we all need to remember that even the experts get nervous! Some other good reminders too, thanks.
So true. I think it shows we care about what we are talking about, and want a great outcome for our clients and audience
Love it Jenny this is something that happens to all of us. Thanks for sharing great tips for getting your mojo and confidence back!
thanks Linda – you and I know there are so many people with something so worthy of sharing, and nerves hold them back.I hope this helps a little.
I think the best advice here is to admit your nerves. Everyone has been in that position and being authentic about who you are almost guarantees people will be kind.
I agree to an extent. If you have been around for a long time, admitting to nerves might unsettle an audience. What do you think?
Great tips Jenny. I appreciate it when the speaker admits to being slightly nervous. Why? Because we’re all human, and I think I can take more comfort with someone who is authentic with themselves.
Agreed! I encourage clients to learn as much and rehearse as much as they can to reduce the nerves, but we never truly get rid of them because we care. I have butterflies even after 25 years!
Jenny – great advice. These tips would work for any type of presentations, video blogs and of course facebook live. Thank you for sharing
Thanks Elise. You’re so right – even a podcast people could feel a bit unconfident! Not you, but your guests might xx
Like a bad first date escaping out the loo window, I’ve not quite made it to the restaurant yet! I am trying to build the confidence to go live so these tips are really useful for me.
Don’t forget to check out my Facebook live for beginners post Mel. There are loads of tips on there, and my ultimate resources page. You can do it!
Seriously need to come back and read this weekly! Thank you!
Thanks Lisa – looking forward to seeing you again soon!
This rocks.. being confident or appearing confident is a great way to connect with your audience and appear as the authority on your chosen topic!
Thanks Steve – I hadn’t really thought about it like that, but confidence sells doesn’t it!
Amazing advice Jenny! Great tip about ‘hiding’ for a practice on Facebook live, I think I’ll have to give that one a go.
Good place to start Sasha, but don’t hide that awesomeness too long on your personal secret hidden practice lives!
Some behavioral styles will find this easier than others
I’m intrigued David – care to share your thoughts on this?
Im doing a 30 day fb live challenge at the moment. Thanks Henny for the great tips.
good luck with the challenge Kim! don’t forget to keep all those topics/ideas somewhere so you can reuse them and choose the ones you felt the best about to save, share and promote! If you’d like more Facebook Live tips – don’t forget to check out my Ultimate Resources Page right here on the website